Those Lazy Crazy Halloweens

I grew up with a kid who dressed as a ghost every Halloween. You must know the costume I'm talking about---white bed sheet, with holes hacked out for the eyes. I finally got the courage to ask him about his repetitive costume choice and it turned out his mom was simply too lazy to buy him a real costume.

I am absolutely, positively, 100 percent certain that I'm going to end up as that particular brand of Halloween mom.

I very nearly did not buy Riley a costume this Halloween. Last year, I found him an Old Navy purple dinosaur costume on Halloween day that was marked 80 percent off. As respectable parents had already purchased their offspring's costumes weeks ago, it was pretty slim pickins. Riley ended up with a costume two sizes two big.

So this year, my plan was to have him re-wear last year's ensemble and change said costume's name from "dinosaur" to "dragon," just to mix things up a bit.

That plan held up until two weeks ago, when I was perusing the merchandise at Goodwill and saw a blinding light and heard an angelic chorus. I had seen it....The Chosen Costume. It was a black leather biker jacket, size 2T. It could be mine for only $4.99.
From there, the biker costume came together easily--I borrowed a do-rag, purchased a baby-sized wife beater, and found a horrendous, "BLING" chain necklace at the dollar store.

Despite the utter perfection of such a costume, my laziness still found a way to come back and bite me. I found a skull patch at Super Walmart to attach to Riley's jacket and decided to rubber cement the thing on, since sewing was so obviously too much work and therefore out of the question. In case you're wondering how well rubber cement works on leather, let me fill you in. It doesn't.

The patch disappeared forever on a pre-emptive trick-or-treating night Saturday. So yesterday, I drove the 15 miles through traffic back to Walmart and bought another one. Again instead of taking five minutes to sew it on (well okay, at least five minutes to thread the needle, five minutes to curse my utter lack of sewing skills and five minutes more for the actual sewing process) I opted for the rubber cement again and watched the thing fall off a mere two hours later. Tonight my plan is to carry the rubber cement in my purse and keep my eyes carefully trained on Riley's coat at all times, re-gluing every 15 minutes or so as needed.

Oh laziness, sometimes you can be such a curse.


Notice how the patch has miraculously re-appeared, after I whipped out my rubber cement.

Hay maze at HallowZOOween.